Marriage customs and matchmaking in Asian countries
The Japanese marriage customs are very exotic and specific. It was a tradition in 19th century Japan that the
older sons were expected to continue the family and so after they got married they stayed with their parents. Such households
were usually home for two or three generations. The head of the family enjoyed indisputable authority and power, he was in
charge of all the property and was the one to arrange the marriages for his children and grandchildren.
In medieval Japan the most common form of marriage was the traditional prearranged variant, which was
largely organized by the parents and matchmakers, not by the bride and the groom themselves. After marriage, the young
couple usually stayed with the husbands' parents, becoming dependent members of the family clan. Such a clan had a
very strict set of behavior rules for every member to observe.
When marriage was contracted, endless horoscope considerations, very intricate and complicated, were
always a matter of importance.
Nowadays, small families prevail in Japan. Concerning marriage, it is still very specific. For example, the
traditions call for a great role of the matchmaker, who is a professional in choosing brides and grooms, making his choice
on a rational basis. It is thought that those who choose their partner themselves risk making a mistake because of
romantic considerations, love etc.
The matchmaking is carried out by special marriage agencies with the help of computers. It is quite common
for the municipalities and personnel departments of large corporations to engage in matchmaking activities.
The main guideline in the choice of a suitable partner in Japan is the social status of a person, which comes
from his/her professional activities, education level, financial position. It matters, first of all, because marriage and the
ceremonies concerned are exceptionally expensive. For reasons of prestige, the Japanese sacrifice lots of money to conduct
the wedding ceremony up to standard.
Marriage is preceded by an engagement agreement, which is accompanied with mutual exchange of presents in
the presence of parents and witnesses. The bride and the groom exchange lists of their relatives with a detailed comment
on the relation degree. There is national Japanese etiquette, which sets the value of the present and even the way it
should be packed.
As well as the bride and the groom, some of the main characters of a wedding ceremony are the sinoit priest
(kannusi) and his assistants (miko). In the beginning of the ceremony the priest conducts the ritual of purification,
reading the ancient prayers. The bride and the groom accept from each other little cups of Japanese vodka sake,
drinking three sips from each. After that, they exchange wedding rings. The ritual ends with the pledge of the
bride to be faithful to the husband and the family.
A characteristic feature of Japanese wedding feasts is the strict regulation of the way the guests are placed
at the table, the rules of their interaction with each other and the sequence of toasting. The order of the wedding is
very much respected.
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